Spent.

I am just pure exhausted.. I think the Lupron is sucking the life out of me.. I am constantly tired and have no motivation and a constant non stop headache.. Tylenol makes it go away for a few hrs then its right back. Its almost over.. Will hopefully be triggering Monday or Tuesday!! I had to add menopur with the follistim because I was not responding like I should. My e2 on day 5 was a whopping 149...Not very good for day 5 of stims. I will only be getting about 6 or 7 eggs out of this.. was totally hoping for more.. but I guess thats what you get with DOR. She said its not bad, but its not great.

I'm so thankful for my office.. I didn't  have to pay for any menopur and just in case I run out of Follistim.. they gave me another 300 :) I've only had to order another 900 vial.. 742 dollars later.. Ack. So a little over 3 grand for meds. But the Menopur is doing what it should my follies are catching up, will ask for my e2 tomorrow since I have to go back.. again.  In one week i've been to Springs 4 times.. and tomorrow will make 5.. then i'm sure i'll be there again Monday.

I think my emotions are about to explode between being tired and hopped up on hormones.. Its not a pretty sight.. Oh and my poor tummy looks like a pin cushion! It will all be worth it in the end.. It just has to be.

Retrieval will be either Wednesday or Thursday and I will be off for a week and a half.. Can I get and amen there!? Mini Vacay .Woot.

~Nicki

Finally!!

Started stims last night!! It stung a bit but i'll get over it lol. I think i'm going to a do a bullet post because I have to leave for work in a few and I'm just flat out tired.

- Black Friday well.. Thursday cause it was Dead Friday.. Was freaking nuts. Or as Danny said Nucking Futs. LOL

- Still recovering from working 4-12am. Then back at 9am the next day... Yeah. Tired.

- Our Dogs are spoiled!

- Did I mention I'm tired??

- Woke up at 8:30 today thinking i'll sleep till 9.. um 9:40. oops.

- I don't want to do to work today.

- Tomorrow Danny says we will put up the Christmas decorations tomorrow.. We will see.

- Big R tomorrow to try and pick out clothes for Photos on Monday !!

- First Follie check on Monday!

- We're getting pictures done Monday and i'm so excited :)

Gotta go!  If I can make it thru today.. UGH.

~Nicki

Why does...

  This season always seemed rushed?? Today we are having Thanksgiving with my parents. Danny started Day shift today for the next 2 months, not cool. So right after he gets home and changed we will be on our way! My first Pumpkin pie is done and cooling, green bean casserole is ready for the oven when we get there and deviled eggs are ready.  Hope the pie tastes good LOL it doesn't look pretty.. I need to find a new crust recipie.. its just never enough OR maybe I should use it all instead of cutting it in half like it says to do.

I've been super tired and sluggish lately I just can't get going.. Unless I'm in a rush then its go, go, crash. I think Its the Lupron. I get little headaches here and there and hot flashes and then I'm so tired. It will be worth it in the end.. I know that for sure. One thing I'm worried about that never dawned on me until a few weeks ago.. What if this works and I get pregnant with twins and something happens and I can't work?? We'd be totally screwed.. i've never applied for any insurance thru my work.. and the offer things like short and long term disability. Ugh.. and open enrollment has passed. I'm at a loss! I don't know what to do.. also I want to take time off after Transfer so i'm not jostling things around.. but I have to take it off at the time of retrieval too. I think I'll take 2 weeks and have to call it good! Ugh.. so much to think about.

I have my appt wed and will start stimming shortly after that! Getting close.. and praying everyday that this will work.


I think I might take a nap.. before Danny gets off at 3.

~Nicki

PS: I finally am below 230.. Now I will totally ruin that this evening haha.

Minor Freak out.

I had like and ZOMG moment last night driving home from work. I start Lupron tonight.. ACK. I had everything running thru my head... Can I do this, will everything work out or will we have tons of bumps in the road? Will we have any  embies to freeze, will we get pregnant? Just everything. I sure hope everything goes nice and that my meds don't give me to bad a time with symptoms and such.

And Danny just ruined one of my nice mini spatulas..

~Nicki

Mixed Feelings.

I'm feeling stressed and anxiety all at the same time.. I'm not digging it. I just want everything to get here and be done with and oddly be in the 2ww.. and find out at the end that we are pregnant.

Right now i'm battling a cold.. Not fun. Between clogged ears, nose, sneezing, millions tissues and fatigue.. I don't seem to be getting any better.. I just want to SLEEP.

I've been trying to get the energy and I can't think of a word for it.. to finish Gideon's baby book. I just can't bring myself to do it. I have the pictures and everything.. I just need to do it. Maybe Danny needs to be home with me while he plays video games or something? I Don't know.. but when I'm by myself I can't do it.. I almost did a little while ago.. but I made Kettle corn and plopped down on the couch. Once I get going it won't take me long.. Maybe before Christmas.

Speaking of. There is only 52 DAYS before Christmas! I want to have everything done EARLY.  But I know that won't happen LOL. I made Danny put my countdown outside ;) he was very reluctant hahah I said but its a COUNTDOWN! Hahah he has to learn to live with it :). Also I get to have Thanksgiving with my Parents.. not my brother tho.. as he will be overseas this year. But I'll take it.. haven't had Thanksgiving with them in um like forever. I can't even remember its been THAT long. It will be the Sunday before because me and Danny have to work.. but we will take it!


Now i'm going to go Pin my little heart away on Pinterest! Need Decorating Ideas!!

~Nicki