Hmm.. Ponder..

I wonder if I can keep all 11 plants.. I planted today.. alive.. I still have 8 more.. but most likely they will live cause they are low maintence.. Now my rose bushes and hostas.. I dunno.. Still have to plant Hydrangas... I think this should be my summer goal! I REALLY want my rose bushes to survive.. They are orange and should Be SO pretty!

In other news.. My car needs a new alternator and a blet.. Sad day. Getting it Pay Day. Hoping that Danny and my dad can fix it *pray* Don't have an extra 200 bucks for install... ontop of 180 and 40 for belt!

Finally did not much of anything this weekend.. Nice.. plus sleeping in. Hung out with Jeff this weekend :) He's so cool and laid back! I'm still tired tho... I think most of its just stress.. thinking that 2 years is approaching for the baby making mark.. which sucks.. a bunch.. To think that I can't even get pregnant.. just hurts. I know alot of other ladies have been going at this longer than me and are older.. but it still hurts just the same.

I'm scared to meet my new godson.. he's due any day... I know my heart is going to break when I meet him for the first time. I'm just gonna ball I can feel it.. I can feel my eyes tearing up just thinking about it. I'm scared i'm never going to have that... I just want to know what its like to be pregnant just.. once just one time.. I hope I get that.

~Nicki

Good and Bad news..

Good news:
- Danny Passed the ASVAB with flying colors and qualifys for every job in AF and Military anyways .. except one :) So he has the choice of the job he wants!

- We thought the water heater went out.. the door covering is was broken in pieces when we got home... NOT COOl.. no hot water for shower.. so we waited till this morning to drain sedimint.. and turn it up.. Only to find out.. The pilot light got blown out.. *thumbs up*

-Finally got some rest.. pretty restless sleep tho.. woke up like 3 times.. ew.


Bad News:
- Danny did not pass his physical as we feared.. Not to mention Dr was asshole I hear. He has to get a note from Dr saying his vericose veins do not cause him problems and has never been seen by a Dr for them. Also.. Neeeds a back x-ray because 'he has a slight curve' It has to be like under 10 % or something like that... He goes on Thurs. then will go to recruiter to fax it.. then has to go back in 30 days.. to redo Duck walk and knee stands.. (stupidest things EVER) Then.. Hope and pray to god that the AF Surgon general gives him a waiver... Praying SO HARD for this.. its just another set back.. in hopes of him finally getting in.

-First natural cycle as I had suspected did not work.. I freaked myself out cause I used an OPK as a preg test.. and got 2 lines which isn't normal for me that late in a cycle... BAD Idea.. actual preg test.. 2 of them were negative.

- I have been so mentally and phsyically exaghsted.. that I almost snapped on the ride to the recruiters on Monday.. it wasn't pretty.. I have the hugest bags under my eyes.. I actually have to wear make up to look decent!?!?! I feel like I'm 35.

- Not looking forward to work.. when do I tho? oh yeah.. Sundays when Andi isn't there. Which I had enough of her 'mood swings' and attitude.. I finally said something to Jonna and Jeff.. they we're completly flabbergashted.. Yeah.. She seems sweet.. try working with her.

I'm sure there was some other stuff.. my brain is so scattered anymore...I can't remeber how to freaking tie my shoes!!! I've just been so worried and stressed.. Both me and danny has.. and its taking its toll.. its been 2 WEEKS since we've done.. anything... besides kiss eachother good bye. I tried last night.. but Danny was just dead beat.. I'm so proud of him and how far he's come.

We both are dying for a vacation to get away.. But.. i think some repairs may hinder that.. I need a new belt for car.. we both need windsheilds.. Personally belt is more important that windsheild! We seriously need to do somethign before we kill eachother.. Or find someway to get the stress to melt away.

The weather has been nice.. finally non-windy.. Need to put my veggies.. out. but still a little chilly! Hmm.. Rain expected the rest of this week.. But thats ok! I LOVE thunderstorms! They relax me :) I'm hoping I work early Thurs.. then me and Danny can spend some time together.. and catch up on our shows! Lawn seriously needs to be mowed!!!!

Having a rough few weeks... hopfully a good update soon.. Off to take Danny to MEPS finally hoping all will go well and he gets the job he wants.. and that he passes the Physical.. I'll be staying at my moms since, it would be wasiting gas to drive up drop him off then turn around and go get him Tues night..

I am dead tired already... Off We go .. Dog inculded.. *snooze*

*SCREAMS*

My husband can be an arrogant asshole.. Seriously.. OMG *SCREAM* drives me nuts!! Everything thing I say goes in one in ear and out the other.. never takes ANY input.. I think I should be a psychologist...I'd make a good one. I have alot of common sense..

Peeing on a stick tomorrow.. Going crazy. Its raining but instead of listening and relaxing while it rains.. I'm fustrated and going to punch my husband.

Ugh..

Not feeling so hot.. got sick a little while ago.. I think its the orange juice..Ugh.. and I just ate again.. now not feeling so good again.. I can't win!

So far in the natural cycle i've O'ed on my own :) So i'm offically in my 2ww! Its exciting.. and nerve wracking at the same time...


Had my little mini vacation go back to work here at 2.. Had an awesome week/weekend.. did everything we wanted to do. Friday we went to Big R with my parents and got last min stuff for Baby Shower, had dinner and called it a night.
Saturday was the baby shower.. It went so well :) I'm happy how it turned out! Then that night we went to Copperhead Rd.. Um yeah hahah it was AWESOME Danny doesn't remember much.. he spent most of the night in the truck sleeping it off and getting sick ;) I had a little too much to drink myself.. But hey.. I needed to let loose! All went to Village Inn afterwards.. Couldn't get danny out of truck.. So we ate and then all went home :)

Sunday we went and saw How to Train your Dragon in 3D it was pretty cool! Then came home Chilled ate Easter dinner and then went to bed! And Monday we got me some new sneakers for work and that was about it.. drove home in a dust bowl.. wind was HORRIBLE!! Went to Jeffs for dinner yum! Slept in and Tuesday we just cleaned and chilled :)

Now i'm ready for another one..! Oh well gotta wait.. hopefully work won't be too bad today haha first day back and I have to work till 11 Ugh! And I'm not feeling good..hope i'm not getting sick.. Or if i'm preg from last cycle.. that would be ok too I never did take a test.. My stomach has been feeling really.. blah crampy, gassy and just not right..

My cat decided to jump onto my head and cut my lip and head open last night.. Thanks to the dog.. It hurt. and bled alot.. Not cool.. I take forever to heal.. Not like i need more scars to add to the collection on my face...

Guess I need to get ready for work.. and the wind needs to stop blowing.. its been blowing since like Saturday.. Argh!

~Nicki